With kindness that is! I kind of had a bit of a meltdown yesterday. This weekend I sat on the couch literally all weekend trying to rest for this coming week. However, every time I got up to do the smallest things pain just shot through me and made it unbearable. It got me (and Mike) just really scared for this week. What are we going to do. . .I can't take care of Loren like this. . .
The way this condition works is that you have a "best" that you feel. However, if you push beyond that "best" you have a new and worse "best." You can't go back to the way you were before. I've just pushed too far. My new best is that I can walk . . . and barely at that. . .thank God for riding carts at grocery stores. . .go ahead and laugh. . .I do. . .I run into everything!!!
It is hard for me to ask for help when I am in pain. Ever since I was diagnosed with Lupus I think that I need to push through pain to gain some personal victory (or maybe it's just a way of denying that there is anything wrong). . .it's hard to explain.
So anyway, I had a small little meltdown at church last night. Within minutes the church had a calendar of "who was taking Loren and what days." I just lost it! I couldn't believe that people were so willing to give to Mike, Loren and I like that. Then this morning I get a call from Mom telling me that she has worked out the week so that someone will be here to help me with Loren every day. THEN, I got a call from Bonnie saying she is on a flight tomorrow and will be here until the baby is born.
I am just sobbing as I type this realizing, yet again, that God is so faithful. That he will give us a way out from under the trials he sends our way: He will help us withstand them. It just overwhelms me that people love my family and I enough to drop EVERYTHING and be by our side.
5 comments:
Kimberly, I'm sorry you're in so much pain. I didn't realize that was happening to you. I take it's directly related to the Lupus?? We'll keep you in our prayers. How awesome to have friends and family who will step up! When is your EDD? You can't have too much longer to go. Hang in there. Sending you hugs!
If I could be there with you, I would!! This is the exact reason why God gives us a church family to rely on. We weren't created to do everything ourselves. We are made to live in community. Accept every bit of help that comes your way. Find your comfy spot on the couch, grab some magazines, put your feet up and stay there until that baby comes! No need to wear yourself out. Loren will come to you for hugs and snuggles! :) Just keep remembering that the end product is more than worth the pain that you're feeling now. You don't have too much longer to go. I will be praying that this little guy or girl comes quickly! If you get bored...or feel tempted to push through the pain...call me and I'll keep you company (or talk some sense into you)! :)
Bethie. . .this has absolutely nothing to do with Lupus. you know how much joint pain I endure daily with Lupus? Well. . .this is the worst joint pain I've ever experienced. I'm-a-dying!
I will know my induction date on Wed. . .I hope. . .please please pray that he will concent to a 38 week delivery. I can't make it too much longer.
I'm sorry you're in pain! I too wish I was closer to help, but I'll keep praying for you. Friends and family are definitely blessings from God. Will the pain go away after the baby is born?
You continue to be in my prayers. I'm so thankful for all the people that God has put in your life to help you when you need it!
Post a Comment